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AskSam: 90 Days to Husband #2 – Quarantine Edition Tips To Help You Navigate the Wild World of Online Dating



The Rotation Schedule Rule #10 Add/Delete Until A Keeper Emerges

If the end goal is a husband, don’t waste time. The rotation schedule is based on the number of hours available for dating divided by the number of candidates courting you. The rotation schedule technique allows you to not waste time, yours or other peoples.  As soon as you know, you would not like to marry someone, set them free, so you can move on and so can they. A rabbi once told me that if you ask the right questions you know if it’s a yes or know in about ten minutes. I’m suggesting a little further in depth investigation and perhaps even sampling the merchandise before you make up you mind if necessary. But ten minutes or less is about the duration of time it takes to decide if you want the first date to continue or not, or to decide if the person will make it to date number two.

With 24 hours in a day and 7 days in the week, technically there is opportunity for 21 dates in the course of the week. Just like going to the gym, your  dating abilities are like muscles that can be well honed. Think of it as multitasking. You have to eat, so you might as well have some company and meet a new person during your coffee, lunch and dinner. 

In reality if you’re going on between 3 and 5 first dates a week, you’re on the right track, but it might take you a little longer than 90 days to find your mate. In your black book, 10 men in the dating rotation is the maximum number of people to have in the mix at once. Whether it’s zoom or socially distanced outings. For your sanity and time, 3-5 is a good number.
State whom you are looking for, be a good listener and ask fun engaging questions. You will soon find out whether you share core values, compatibility and chemistry. These are three different things, be aware the difrences. Being spiritual is a value. Love of movies is compatibility. Chemistry is that intangable energy of attraction you feel for one another, how you interact together.   Use your newfound dating skills to discern if a candidate is going to make it to the second date, third date etc. somewhere after 3 to 7 dates you should know whether you’re going to discard or move forward in the relationship.

Don’t get stuck with the wrong person. Until there’s a ring on your finger with a formal commitment, you are a free woman and technically, single. This is not about looking for a boyfriend in 90 Days, it’s about finding a husband. If you’re seeking husband number two, you don’t have time to waste. 

If your mission is finding husband number two, do not make the tragic mistake of shacking up with a boyfriend. Remember that is not the point of this book and until you have a commitment, you’re a free woman. 
Keep a calendar, schedule and a black book of candidates with notes about how you met, details you learned about them and things you would like to know about them. This way you can remember who’s who and can assess each date after it happens and decide whether that particular candidate is going to move to the next round or be eliminated just so that you have time and space to add in the next contestant. 

Pro Tip:  Plan dates that allow for a wardrobe that goes from day to evening therefore you don’t have to waste time by running home to change.  I also suggest keeping a small bag of toiletries and a pair of high heels and a pair of flats at your desk. 

Pro Tip:  Pack a clutch inside your day bag so that you can check your coat and your day luggage and just waltz in with your little clutch.
Don’t get overwhelmed, the odds are in your favor. Many men will be attracted to you. There are a few suitable candidates. One of them is right for you. Finding your mate requires putting yourself out there, strategically, based on whom you’ve decided you’re looking for. 

Your prince charming is out there. The laws of mathematics are on your side, the world is big, the global population is about 7.8  billion people. If there are two women for every one man, even if some men are already married, or gay, too old, too young, factoring in self imposed boundaries like distance, language, religion, education, social standing, height etc., that’s still a vast pool to choose from. The numbers are on your side. Yeah!

To see video #1 click here.

To see video #2 click here.

To see video #3 click here.

To see video #4 click here.

To see video #5 click here.

To see video #6 click here.

To see video #7 click here.

Samantha von Sperling is a lifestyle guru who has spent her entire career going above and beyond to help her clients achieve their goals. “When asked what I do, I will tell you that I “Spit shine” people and things for a living. My arsenal of expertise helps smooth out the rough spots, whether it’s your look, the space you inhabit, or how you interact with the world around you. Our goal is to help you feel more comfortable in your skin and confident in your ability to handle any social situation with panache! Keen insight and fresh perspective is the first step to attaining your goal. Everything in life at some level is a matter of packaging and a game of seduction, a new job, a step up a ladder, the winning over of clients and friends or the conquest of your desire. Tell me what you want, what you need, even if it seems trivial, personal or impossible. If I can’t help you, I’ll tell you. If I can, it shall be done.” Samantha was raised in a sophisticated family where entertaining international guests was de rigueur; refined manners, elegant dress, proper posture, the art of conversation, and ballroom dancing are second nature to her. Her education is a continuation of a lifelong passion for the arts and a foundation for her business. Armed with a degree from New York University in Educational Theatre with a concentration in Speech Communications – also a classically trained ballroom dancer and actress – von Sperling set out the offer the world a new approach to the old concept of finishing. She uses her diverse talents through innovative group seminars or with one-on-one consultations. By utilizing all her skills and training, von Sperling has fulfilled requests from royal families, diplomats, politicians, celebrities, CEOs, companies big and small, regular joes, and soccer moms. Ms. von Sperling has appeared in print publications such as The New York Times, TIME Magazine, O The Oprah Magazine, Bloomberg Businessweek, and The Wall Street Journal, to name a few. She appears as a guest expert on numerous television programs, and currently contributes as ImageGal for and writes her own column, “Ask Sam” for Time Square Chronicles which she counts amongst her great joys in life. Samantha von Sperling from POLISHED Social Image Consultants has been on the forefront of the image consulting industry for a decade, helping to bring out the best in you – from the boardroom to the ballroom.

Ask Sam

In Honor of February Heart Awareness Month 



Since I’m a #survivor, I decided to share  my heart story. Heart disease is the No.1 killer of women.
So eat a healthy diet and exercise, it could save your life. Please learn CPR, you could be the difference for someone else.
So I’m living my life to the fullest wearing red!
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Ask Sam: Interview with CJW



You might remember Chris Weaver a.k.a, CJW, Velvet voiced up-and-coming artist, living in Brooklyn New York. From his grand debut on season 13 of The Voice, a competition reality show on TV for talented singers. 
Growing up in the church CJW takes much inspiration from Gospel and classic R & B. In our interview with Weaver he said his goal with his music is to create a “feel good” Energy for his audiences.
CJW’s versatile range is outstanding. He’s ready to put on his show wherever, whenever and give his fans a taste of what can be seen of him live In our interview. 
I loved doing this interview with CJW has so much talent wrapped in an extremely lovely and positive person. I had the pleasure of co hosting the interview with my friend and colleague Martina.
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Ask Sam: I’m back! Better than ever!



It’s been an honor to write this column all these years alongside a privilege to write about various lifestyle topics, especially pertinent to us city dwellers, and have the freedom to speak my mind to all of you in a way I hope made you smile. I could not write all these articles about striving to be our best, unless I understood that our best is an elusive thing.

You can watch Samantha here

We are always growing and changing. The way we balance our wobble board of life is always shifting as we fight to maintain balance. Through the course of this shifting and striving, even if it’s just by a breath, the idea is to be better than yesterday. That’s the best we can do.

Samantha Bessudo Drucker

I’ve been quiet for a while so that I may put myself through a metamorphosis that has taken me some time to incubate my chrysalis. With a bigger wingspan, I can fly and I am excited to finally be able to share the launch of my rebrand with you!

Jeffrey and Samantha Bessudo Drucker

After a shining 20 years as the director of Polished Social Image Consultants – I took a hiatus to get married, author my book “90 Days to Husband No.2,” develop, reinvent, and remerge as – lifestyle genie. “Let me wave my wand!”

Samantha Bessudo Drucker

30 years ago, I started out as an actress and ballroom dancer. Morphed into a makeup artist and stylist, then became a celebrity image consultant for 20 years with clients from around the world including 2 royal families. I took some time off to design a new chapter after marrying my 2nd husband – architect Jeffery Drucker, rebrand, and develop projects that allow me to reach a greater audience.

As a Lifestyle Genie, I help people become the best version of themselves in all aspects, including image, wardrobe, grooming, style, and beauty. Alongside etiquette, social grace, communication skills, romantic advice, and interior design.

I am delighted to be back.

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